Everything You Always Wanted to Know about Acting* Free online reading

He's the anonymous Twitter sensation whose hilarious and unfailingly accurate barbs satirizing and celebrating the theatre industry have won him a devoted following. His identity is the subject of feverish speculation in the media, fueled by his regular appearances at West End opening nights in costume, wig and latex mask. He has become a genuine theatre impresario, launching talent competitions Search for a Twitter Star and its successor, Search for a Twitter Composer.

And now, West End Producer is ready to share all he's learnt about how to get ahead in show business, in the form of an audiobook, narrated by the author himself.

Full of the wit and mischievous indiscretion that has gained him such a cult following, packed with gossip and insider knowledge of the theater business, and containing enough savvy advice on acting to kick start a career, West End Producer's audiobook offers tips (both practical and deliciously impractical) on:

• Getting into drama school (Learning how to sit in a circle)
• Auditioning (Perfecting the "staring vacantly out front" pose)
• Rehearsals techniques (Including how to act in a serious play)
• The different kinds of actor (From sex pest to company idiot)
• Combating boredom (And avoiding backstage naughtiness)
• How to behave at first-night parties (Obeying the traffic-light color code)
• And, most importantly, the correct way to bow at the curtain call

Also included in the audiobook are many of West End Producer's most memorable tweets, miniature comic salvos dispatched with all the shrewdness of a man who truly knows his Barrowmans from his Balls.